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Life After Divorce

Personal goals for 2017… year-end goal update

I blogged very little this year.  I’ll state the obvious, which is just as true for YOU as it is for me, I’m sure: this year has been so busy.  It zipped by and brought an abundance of change, similar to most years. But 2017 was unique for me in one big way: this year, I drove some of that change myself. I was proactive. I wrote some goals for 2017 to be sure that no matter what came my way, I would not simply pour myself into chasing all of the uncontrollable external changes that life can bring – that I would direct some of my resources toward adding more joy and connection to my life.

These weren’t New Year’s resolutions, and they also weren’t work-related goals.  I already focus plenty of energy on work, thankyouverymuch. (You can relate, can’t you?)  Instead these were personal goals designed to bring me closer to my friends and family and to squeeze more pleasure out of my non-work hours.  Here’s a status update on each of my 2017 personal goals.

  • Enjoy 8 books (either by reading or listening).  Mid year, I chose to relinquish this goal. I discovered that I don’t crave a good book as much as I used to.  During my marriage, I was at times a somewhat avid reader.  Now I apparently prefer podcasts. Before shoving this goal aside, though, I read a few good books and would particularly recommend Year of Yes by Shonda Rhimes.   One-line review: inspiring, enlightening book by uber-successful media mogul, which supercharged my desire to step up my game and expect more out of myself and my life.  Fair warning: it also caused serious curiosity about Rhimes’ hit show, Grey’s Anatomy, which led to binge-watching the show on Netflix. Consider yourself warned.

  • Take 2 classes just for fun.  Did it! In fact, I took 3, all on painting… mixed media, painting on rice paper, and Light and the Landscape from online art instructor Will Kemp.  (His class was great, by the way.)
Flower Garden painting in acrylic

Flower Garden painting, acrylic

  • Take 3 day trips or overnighters.  This goal got derailed but for a good reason.  I did take a trip to Philadelphia to see my mother and stepfather at Mother’s Day, and I had planned a trip to Denver in late August as well as a trip to Richmond in September to see my aunt and uncle.  As it turns out, my mom made a sudden but long-awaited decision to move to Ohio.  Here’s the short version of a long story: I found out about their moving plans in early July, 4 days later their house sold, and by mid August I was flying to Philly to help her coordinate the move.  By Labor Day, they were settled into their new home.  In the process, the Denver and Richmond trips had to be cancelled, but it’s well worth it since my mom now lives just 15 minutes away!  And travel will definitely be on my list of 2018 goals.

Biking Gear picture

  • Check one new state off my go-to list.  Well, that was going to be Colorado in August.  Stay tuned for 2018 travel plans, including a weekend getaway to Lily Dale, New York in April with my bestie.
bikes on covered bridge

Crossing the covered bridge in Waldo, Ohio.

  • See at least 10 moves this year.  Did it!  Saw 13.   These were great: Hidden Figures, Going in Style, Snatched, Gifted, Despicable Me 3, Girls Trip, and Kingsmen: The Golden Circle.  These were either outright awful or totally not up my alley: Fences (sorry Denzel), Guardians of the Galaxy Pt. 2 (aka when your male friend chooses the movie),  and Dark Tower (another pick by a male friend, and even worse than Guardians of the Galaxy).
women in bike helmets

A couple of sweaty biker chicks.

  • Spend more time with my girlfriends.   Goal achieved – bigtime!  Ginny, Tracy, Laura, Kim, Paula, Peg, Karen, and Joni, I love you ladies!  This year brought opportunities for euchre games, casino trips, Cards Against Humanity, dinner theater, Shakespeare in the Park, a 19-mile bike ride in this year’s Hot Tamale, a new bike route through Waldo, Green Camp, and Prospect, several Paint Nights, and countless dinners and chat fests.  Some of my biggest smiles this year came from nights out with my girlies.
paint nite picture

Paint Nite with my girlfriends

  • And finally, visit mom 3 times and my aunt and uncle once.  I didn’t get to see my aunt and uncle this year – a real bummer.  But thanks to her move and my Mother’s Day visit, I have seen my mom more than I have in 25 years, and that has been wonderful!
Me and Mom at Thanksgiving

Me and Mom at Thanksgiving

So, some of my personal goals were met this year, and some weren’t – and I’m okay with that. The purpose was to bring more joy, pleasure, and connection to my life, and that purpose was certainly achieved!  And working to achieve these personal goals caused some rather awesome side-effects… like reconsidering what self-care means, thinking about where I want to be in five or ten years, and even taking some classes to help advance my future.

I’m formulating my 2018 goals now and suspect that they’ll be bolder and more meaningful than this year’s.  If YOU have some goals you would like to share, I would love to hear them!  Tell me about what changes you’re striving for and how you’ll keep yourself focused on achieving your purpose throughout the year!  Please drop me a note in the comments below.

Happy holidays!


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